A whore:

So Friday carina tells me that she'll take me to the renaissance faire if I give her gas money.
Yesterday I get picked up from Paul's and I tell carina bri was going with us. And ten both her and my mom start yelling at me saying they're not doing it because I said next week, when next week carina isn't even going to be here. Why would I ask her to take me next week if I knew she wasn't going to be here? So my mom begins to tell me that I ask for too much, and never give anything in return. That I won't amount to anything and I'll I've done is disrespect them and give them hell.
So I said, maybe you should of thought twice before opening your legs. Then you wouldn't of had me, and you wouldn't of had to bother with me. Or maybe should of left me at the hospital.
You should of let me die.
Then she said "at least I don't open my legs for every guy I've met. You let them use you an treat you like the whore you are"
"At least when I opened my legs, it was someone I married"
This morning Liz started to bitch at me because I had out up "my mom called me a slut" up on Facebook. Saying my mom didn't. So I told her to go ask her for herself. And she did. Then comes to my room and proceeds to botch at me that the only reason I was acting like that was because tet weren't taking me to the faire. But she wasn't there.. How would she know what went on? How could she possibly know how deep my mom cut me? So I'm a liar because I told the truth and decided to deny it, and place them blame on me...

So last night I couldn't put my knife down. I felt so low. I felt so betrayed. I felt so worthless. It took every ounce of being I had left to not drag that blade across my skin, to not let this old demon of mine win. I know that even now it clings to my back, it clings to my mind, begging me to do it.
But at the same time another voice is yelling at me to fight it. Another voice is trying to grasp what was left of me and save me.